


Secrets Aren’t Fun

by Gay_Turtles



Series: Creepy Crawly Death Dealers [1]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Gen, No Beta we Die Like Enbys, Slight prinxiety at the end of you squint, Spider!Virgil, Updates Sporadically, idk what this is, if at all, maybe? - Freeform, more or less, nobody can communicate well, this is really bad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-15
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-02-25 05:14:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 3,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21810640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gay_Turtles/pseuds/Gay_Turtles
Summary: Sooooo..... uh, Virgil is a spider, and that’s all there really is too it.
Series: Creepy Crawly Death Dealers [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1571614
Comments: 41
Kudos: 251





	1. Secrets Start And Secrets End

**Author's Note:**

> So I really like this AU and it’s angstyness. Ergo, I wrote shitty fan fiction. Warning, there is some cussing, mostly from Virgil, as he doesn’t give a shit, except for around Patton. When Deceit lies, the lie is bolded.

Janus hadn’t always been half snake. That is, until Thomas associated snakes with lies, or squids as gross with Remus. Virgil knew only dark sides were animalistic. Not strictly human.

Thomas has always been afraid of spiders, since he was old enough to know what a spider was. But our story takes place when Thomas was in 6th grade. Virgil has just manifested in the dark side’s commons room, where Deceit and Remus were ecstatic.

”W-Who are you?” Virgil muttered.”Where am I?” 

Janus began, “How about you **don’t** tell us who yo-“ 

“Where are his... additions?” Remus interjected, his electric green tentacles drooping behind him. Deceit began to scold Remus, while Virgil stared in shock. At Remus’s tentacles, at Janus’s scales. 

“Anxiety.” He said, “ You can call me Anxiety.” The arguing pair looked over. 

“Well then, Anxiety. I **won’t** take you to your room.” Deceit said. 

At the end of a short, darkly lit hall, sat Virgil’s room. It was a deep purple, and somehow there was even less lighting than in the hallway. 

“I guess I’ll see you later then?” The anxious trait said, unsure. 

“Ok,” Janus said, “that’s **not** fine.” 

“Byeeee, dork!” Remus shouted. 

With the door closed and locked, he could take a breath, but his heart beat picked up soon. It was fast. Almost, _too_ fast. Something was wrong. His breath hitched, like he was having a panic attack. Oh, but it hurt. It hurt so bad. His form began to shift, glowing an almost white purple. Four large appendages that shines purple under the lights sprouted from his back, teeth elongated into fangs, a second, smaller, pair of eyes open under his regular ones. He hit the floor and passed out, letting his mind escape from the burning pain. 

•••••••••••••••••••• 

Deceit was nuking some cold pizza, when a loud thump emanated from Anxiety’s room. That couldn’t be good. 

The handle shook under a scaled hand, breaking soon after. Anxiety was splayed on the floor, four spider-like appendages sprouting from his back. They were long as he was tall, and segmented into 3 long dark purple parts. 

•••••••••••••••••••• 

“Get in there!” The anxious trait spat. 

Several knocks sounded from the door in a quick succession. “Kiddo?” Patton called out, “May I come in?” 

“One minute.” Virgil replied. His extra legs wouldn’t fit into his sweatshirt. They ached, he must have slept on them wrong. 

”That’s ok, breakfast is in a little while, so hurry up and get down stairs!” Patton replied.

Not a minute later, he had wrestled his additions into a baggy hoodie. Next was the eyeshadow. If applied correctly, Virgil could completely conceal his midnight black eyes by surrounding them with black eyeshadow. 

“Heya, kiddo!” Patton said excitedly from the stove, “ You’re just in time for breakfast! French toast!” 

“Sweet, Pat.” Virgil replied. 

Roman had bounded down the stairs next, a smile present on his face. 

“Emo, you’ll never believe it!” 

“What do you want Roman?” 

“We’re having French toast!” 

“No shit, Princey.” 

“Wow, I’m so hurt, Virge,” Roman said in mock sadness and, still grinning, playfully punched Virgil in the arm.

“OW! What the hell, Princey?!?” 

“You ok Virge? I barely touched you.” 

“I-I need to go,” The purple-clad side said, sprinting up the stairs. Virgil began to take his hoodie off, in the middle of the hallway, when a door opened. Logan. 

“Shit,” Virgil breathed. Logan stared, open mouthed. 

“But I thought, but you never, you, you didn’t, they never, does he?” Logan was at a loss. 

“Virgil? You ok up there?” Patton was coming over, about to see. 

“I’lltalktoyoulaterdon’telltheothers” Virgil rushed to his door, slamming it just as Patton rounded the corner. 

“Lo, what happened?” 

“Virgil had th-“ “Hey Pat!” Virgil yelled, a bit too loud. “How about that French toast?” The three had all walked downstairs, Patton glancing back at Virgil, Virgil trying not to look back, and Logan observing with concern. 


	2. I Have Questions, But I Doubt You’ll Like Them

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shit happens. Remus cusses once. It’s kinda short. Virgil’s a spider. Read the first chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, sorry for the long wait, I’m not gonna give an excuse, I’m just bad at long term deadlines, especially self imposed ones, hopefully I can upload more consistently!

“There’s your french toast!” Paton chirped, seemingly having forgotten the events that had previously transpired, “Bon appetite!”  
“Thanks Padre.” Roman said, mouth full of food.  
Virgil agreed with a nod, taking a bite. 

The four ate breakfast, Logan shooting questioning glances to Virgil over his coffee. Patton began with a cough, clearing his throat. “So as all of you know, today is our monthly deep clean day, so who wants to do what?” “Dusting will be sufficient,” Logan said. “I,” Roman began tauntingly, “will vacuum. Looks like you’re stuck with the bathroom _Virge_.” 

“K, I’ll get to that in a while,” Virgil stated, putting his plate in the dishwasher. “I’ll be in my room.”

••••••••••••••••

The purple clad side flopped down onto his bed, spider legs twitching. Not long after, a knock sounded from the door. “Logan.”  
“Correct.”  
“Uh, you can come in, it isn’t locked.”

The handle twisted, and the logical side entered the room, careful to close the door behind himself. 

•••••••••••••••

Hours later, the door to the dark sides common room opened, an exhausted form stumbling though. Remus sat on the couch, Beetlejuice playing on the cracked tv. 

“Hey.”  
“Hey Jan- VIRGIL? JANUS! Get your ass over here right now! Virgil’s home!” The snake like side appeared almost instantly, wrapping the exhausted in a tight hug.  
“We **didn’t** miss you.”  
“Too. Tight.”  
“I’m **not** sorry.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment if you enjoyed! Thanks for reading y’all! So I got the idea for Remus watching Beetlejuice from TheLastDemiWarriorNinjaofFireSide, and their fic, Has Death Always Been a Subjective Term, GO READ IT, IT’S GOOD. Thanks for reading mine, hope to be back soon!


	3. Being Brash Might not Have Been the Best Course of Action

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ummmm... idk, not much happens. This is mostly a chapter to build up to the climax. Have fun!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, sorry I’ve been gone for a while. I wasn't motivated to work, until 11 at night! WTH, inspiration?!?!? So I finished the chapter, and here she is! Enjoy reading!!!

“What **didn’t** happen?”  
“I’m fine Janus.”  
“Really?”

•••••••••••••••

Logan sat at his desk, book in hand,lost within the pages of A Brief History of Time, a smile apparent on his face, when Roman barged in.  
“What happened.”  
“What?”  
“You Patton and Virgil are all acting weird, and I want to know why.”  
“I still don’t know what you’re talking about.”  
“You know exactly what I’m talking about.”  
“It’s not my place to say.”  
“Tell me anyways.”  
“As I’ve told you before, it isn’t my place to tell you.”  
“Logan.” Roman advances a step, hand on the hilt of his sword. “Tell. Me.”  
“No.”  
“Logan.”  
“No.”  
Patton’s head peaked through the open door, “Hel-oh. What’s going on here?”  
“Nothing Padre,” Roman said while Logan fumed. “Just two friends talking, that’s all.”  
“Sure, sure.” Logan rolled his eyes, annoyance masking his face.  
Patton, however, didn’t seem to notice. “Well then, have any of you seen Virgil, I went to check up on him, but he isn’t in his room.”  
“I’ll go look for him Padre.”

•••••••••••••••

“Are you sure you’re **not** ok?”  
“Yea Jan, I’m good, I better get back now, before Patton gets suspicious. I promise I’ll visit you two again soon. See you later?”  
“Yea,” Deceit says softly, lightly waving Virgil goodbye.

Virgil’s footsteps seemed to echo forever down the dimly lit hallway. He should have gone back sooner, but Remus wouldn’t stop hugging him. The purple clad side was about to round the corner to the hallway with their rooms, when Roman appeared out of nowhere, sword in hand. 

“Agh, what the hell Princey?”  
“Well hello my emo nightmare.”  
“What are you doing, Ro?”  
“Why don’t you tell me where you were first?” Roman says as he puts his sword away.  
“Around.”  
“You know that’s not what I’m talking about.”  
“Fine, Princey. I was with the dark sides, happy?” He says, exasperatedly. “Now can I go already, or are you gonna keep interrogating me?”  
“Whatever, if you’re gonna be rude, then just leave.” Roman threw his hands up, turning away. 

•••••••••••••••

“Oh hey Ro!” Patton called out. The side in question closed the door and slid down to the floor, head heavy in his hands. “So... Roman. Where was virgil, anyways?”

“With the dark sides,” Roman spat. “Why would he go to them? He was obviously hiding something! What did they do to make him go down to that tragic kingdom?”

“Perhaps we could ask the sides in question,” Logan spoke, sliding his glasses further up his nose. “Instead of sitting here doing nothing.”

•••••••••••••••

Moments ago, the door to Logan’s room creaked open an almost imperceptible amount, Virgil on the other side. He listened in to their conversation, pulling at the slightly frayed sleeves of his hoodie. {hey, so, I’m not putting the previous conversation here, cause I don’t want to, so uh... there. Bye!} He had to go warm them, they wouldn’t take well to being pulled up. Besides, they had and knew some... things... he would rather the others not know. 

•••••••••••••••

The door to the dark sides common swung open with a bang. 

“Back again so soon, emo?” Remus teased. “What did you do this time?”

“They suspect something, Remus. Roman thinks that you and Janus are forcing me to come down here, and now they’re gonna find out. Tell deceit I said hi, and don’t forget to hide your tentacles!” Virgil shouted, running back to his room.

“Bye Virge,” Remus said softly. There was a slight tugging sensation as Roman summoned him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment if you enjoyed, or if you have any questions, or if I’ve made any grammar mistakes! Have an awesome [insert time of day here]!!!


	4. THE SHIT HITS THE FAN

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> READ. THE. TITLE.

The light washed over the two of them. It was always brighter up here. 

Roman started with a snarl. “What did you two do to Virgil?”  
“We **did** do anything!” Janus spat.  
“Then why,” Roman stepped forward, “was he with you?”  
“Roman...” Patton’s hand reached out, as if to hold the fanciful side back.

Janus’s hands twitched under his cape-and he knew Remus could only keep up his illusion for so long. Virgil helped as much as he could, but there wasn’t nearly enough time. 

Remus swayed on his feet. That wasn’t good. That _really_ wasn’t good.

“We **won’t** take our leave now. Remus?” The illusion flickered in and out, settling with his tentacles visible. 

Roman’s eyes widened.

Remus fell.

Deceit sprang forward to catch him. With all six arms.

Remus didn’t hit the ground, Janus made sure of that. But now the light sides could see the extra parts of both of them. The things that shouldn’t be there. The things that made them different. Inhuman.

“Now we really **mustn’t** go,”

Janus began to sink out, the Duke in hand, but Logan stopped him, and stated in a cold tone, “Explain. Now.”

“See?” Roman ranted to the ceiling. “I _told_ you that they were up to something! What were you doing to Virgil?”

“So _this_ is why Virgil **did** tell you,” Deceit mumbled as he and Remus sunk out.

“Tell us wha- aaand they're gone.” Roman’s shoulders slumped, head turning to face Logan’s. “What would he be hiding from us?”

“Well, let's ask him and find out. I’m sure it’s nothing,” Patton said with an obviously false hope. The three of them made their way towards the stairs, towards Virgil’s room. Virgil’s room, where the door wasn’t locked. Virgil’s room, where said occupant had his hoodie off and was browsing tumblr and listening to MCR. With headphones. Full volume. Oh. Oh no.

Light spilled into Anxiety’s room, catching Virgil’s attention, and Roman poked his head through the doorway. Towards Anxiety’s bed. Roman looked over to Virgil only to see him, as well as four dark purple spider legs. In a very thought out manner, Princey began to utterly panic, going so far as to yell out “MONSTER!” In a voice that totally didn’t sound like a little girl’s screams. The red-clad side began to hyperventilate, and Virgil promptly sank out. 

••••••••••••••••

The door slammed shut. Roman couldn’t stand, and, to Patton’s increasing worry, was soon on the ground, leaning against the door in the middle of the hallway. 

‘It isn’t possible.’ Roman thought. ‘It can’t be. No. No. Nonononononononono. It-it couldn’t. There’s no way that-it isn’t possible-but he isn’t-he shouldn’t be-how?’ Roman trembled, and nobody could think properly.

•••••••••••••••

Virgil practically collapsed into Deceit’s arms. 

“ **Aren’t** you ok? What happened, little Spiderling?

“What happened?” Virgil said, pushing away from Deceit. “Princey walked into my _fucking_ room that’s what happened.” Janus’s eyes widened, taking in Virgil’s lack of a hoodie. 

“Shit. Remus, get your ass out here!”

The lights glinted off of a familiar morning star, a white glint showing, with trace amounts of a disturbingly dark red. “What is it, sneky b-huh? What happened to gloomy over there? Was it the thing that happened upstairs, because Roman’s face was _hilarious_!” Remus said, punctuating his sentence with a swing of his morning star in the air, tentacles splayed behind him.

“What. did. you. tell. him.” Virgil demanded, taking a step forward, voice echoing menacingly. “What. Happened.” 

•••••••••••••••

“What am I gonna do Padre?” A small, shaky voice began. He usually sounded so proud, and the lack of confidence broke Patton’s heart. “Is he really our friend?” That same voice faded into a murmur, charged with emotion. “Can I still trust him?” The voice broke, and the speaker buried his head into his legs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long everybody, I’m thinking of trying to update every Saturday, but idk. Tell me what you think in the comments, and have a fantastic day! Edit: I edited this chapter as well as the 1st one to show off how different the dark sides are at the request of a comment!


	5. Starting Over, or at Least a Little bit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil is lonely, Roman takes the first step into repeating things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise bitches, I still walk this earth. This is kinda short, as I did it in the span of like, half an hour? anywho, enjoy, sorry for taking to long.

“Roman, you can’t sit here all day. You’re going to have to find him eventually,” Logan said, adjusting his glasses. 

“I know that Lo, But it’s still hard. I told him everything.” Roman leaned back against the door, trying to hide the shakiness in his voice. “He didn’t. And I don’t know what to do.”

“Well,” Patton said, holding his hand out to Roman, a bright smile playing out on his face, “Let’s at least look for Virgil. Why don’t we check the, uh, _basement?”_

__Patton pulled Roman to his feet, and the trio made their way to the basement. To Virgil’s old room._ _

__•••••••••••••••_ _

__The door slammed shut, and was instantly locked. “Go away,” Virgil said, desperation coloring his tone._ _

__He sank into his bed and pulled his legs up to his chest. He needed to hold himself together, however literal it had to be._ _

__Virgil’s head flew up at the sound of someone lightly knocking on his door._ _

__“Virgil, I-we are so sorry.” Janus said. “Is there any way we can help?”_ _

__“Virgil?”_ _

__He didn’t respond. There was nothing they could do to fix this._ _

__•••••••••••••••_ _

__“Virgil? Sorry about the whole… thing.” Roman said. “You know what I mean.”_ _

__“Roman?” His twin responded from around the corner. “Are you looking for Virgil?”_ _

__Roman turned around with an incredulous look on his face. “And what else, pray tell, would I be doing down here?”_ _

__Remus left his brother standing there, yelling “his room’s down the other hall, dipshit,” back._ _

__With a sheepish expression, he turned the right way, and continued forward._ _

__•••••••••••••••_ _

__The sound of someone knocking awoke Virgil from the fitful sleep he had fallen into._ _

__“ I-Virgil. I’m sorry,” Roman started, his head resting on the door. “I hurt you, by not respecting your boundaries, and not giving you space, and I’m sorry. I don’t know if you’re listening to me, or if you even care. But I’m sorry._ _

__Having said all this Roman left for his room, tears trailing down his face at the thought of losing Virgil from his incompetence._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I. Am ashamed. I am sorry for making all of you wait so long for this. If I start taking too long for your liking, I am _begging_ you here, pester me in the comments, otherwise I doubt I’ll ever post. Please, bully me into posting chapters if you have to. Or come pester me on my tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/420gayturtles


	6. Maybe This Might Just be Okay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman and Virgil hug and make up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I DID IT!! I GOT A CHAPTER IN BY A SELF SET DEADLINE! A MINUTE BEFORE THE DEADLINE EXPIRED!

Roman fell face-first onto his bed, a sigh escaping him. How was he gonna fix this? Virgil surely hated him, and for good reason. He had invaded his privacy, his trust. He knew Virgil always had everyone knock before coming in, that was one of the only rules he really had. And Roman had broken it, knowingly.

What wouldn’t he do to take back that mistake?

•••••••••••••••

The door opened, a slightly hunched-over figure, clad in an iconic black and purple hoodie exited the room, and rounded the corner of the hall.

“Hey Jan?”

“Yes?”

“I, um, how,” Virgil started, “You know what? Never mind. I’m just gonna, uh, go back to my room, that’s a good excuse,” Virgil ended in a whisper.

“Virge, I **didn’t** hear Roman come down. You should go say something. I know you care about him, but doing nothing, and leaving him to worry is only going to divide you two, put a rift in your relationship.” Janus put his hand on Virgil’s shoulder, a soft look in his eyes. “You got this. It’ll be ok.”

•••••••••••••••

“Hey Logan?”

“Yeah Pat?”

“Do you think Roman and Virgil are ok?”

“They’ll be ok. I’m sure of it.”

At this Patton hugged Logan a bit tighter from under their pile of blankets, and fell asleep again, while his counterpart continued reading.

•••••••••••••••

Roman’s head shot up as someone timidly knocked on his door. He wiped the tears from his face, and opened the door.

“Hey, princey.”

“I-I Virgil. Are you ok?”

“I wanted to apologize to you, I shouldn’t have hidden that part of myself away like that, I should’ve trusted you.” Virgil leaned back onto the door frame, wrapping his arms around himself and sinking into his hoodie.

“It’s ok, I shouldn’t have walked in like that, I know you always have everyone knock, and I should’ve respected your boundaries, respected you.”

“I was so, so scared.” Virgil shifted uncomfortably as he continued, “I guess I just didn’t want you to see me differently, hate me, and Patton's like, super scared of spiders.”

Roman shook his head slightly, “I could never hate you. And I’m sure the others feel the same way.”

Virgil chuckled, a slight blush coloring his cheeks. “I guess I was being kinda stupid. Thanks for being ok with all this princey. Now I’m gonna go take a nap.”

Virgil began to turn to leave Roman’s room, but quickly threw his arms around Roman, muttering a quiet “Thanks,” before he ran back to his room.

Roman stood for a moment, silently reliving the last few seconds, before collapsing backward onto his bed. A wide grin broke out on his face, and an excited squeal could be heard by all of the other sides.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I legit finished this like, a minute ago. Enjoy this, likely poorly edited, mess of a fic! :) I think, I’ve got maybe one or two more chapters left in this story, then I might try to do some small one/two shots in this same universe/au!


	7. Communication Required

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil finally talks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SORRY. Life has been... _intresting_ as of late. Anywho, have this second to last chapter, cause I don’t know how to finish it!

Roman sat red-faced in his room, unsure of what to do. Of where he and Virgil stood, though the two had just talked.

A screech muffled by a pillow rang throughout the room, unable to be heard by the others.

•••••••••••••••

The door slammed behind Virgil, and he began to swiftly walk down the hallway, pulling his jacket over his shoulders, a bright blush evident on his face. He had someone to talk to.

•••••••••••••••

Thomas was doing the dishes, not playing with the soap bubbles at all, he was a grown man, when someone knocked on the wall behind him.

“ _What in the_ \- oh it’s just you. Hey Virgil,” Thomas said wearily, sighing and leaning back onto the counter. “Thank you for giving me my daily heart attack. What did you want to talk about, Virge?”

“I, um. Can you tell everyone to meet in a minty or two? I’d tell them all myself, but then ali would start practically interrogating me.”

“O-Ok?”

With a sharp nod, Virgil sunk out. Now he just had to tell them. Simple. 

Pat deserved to know anyway, and Remus and Janus shouldn’t have had to hide that part of themselves just to keep my secret.

•••••••••••••••  
Thomas, Patton, Logan, and Roman, as well as Remus and Janus, stood in the living room, looking at Thomas.

“What did you need, Kiddo?” Patton asked him. 

“Virgil wanted us all to talk, but even I don’t know why,” Thomas explained with a shrug. 

Virgil nervously rose up. His hands clasped together, he started talking. Or at least attempting to. 

He floundered, failing to find the right words to explain. He should’ve just told Patton and Thomas alone, spared himself the anxiety. 

Roman swiftly stepped towards Virgil, and gesturing to the jacket hanging limply from his shoulders, asked “May I?”

Virgil stuttered out a shaky “Ok,” And Roman took the jacket, looking to Patton and Thomas. 

This was it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So uh... One chapter left(?)! I hope? I don’t know how to write this, and it’s giving me just the _worst_ second-hand anxiety:( See you guys next time, I guess!!


End file.
